I grew up with the concept to fight for what I believe in. Does taking the stand and convincing the masses that I have validity in my argument make me happy? I fought with others on moral and ethical values. I fought for my ideas and ideals. I had to convince them that my way was the “right” way. I went to bed agonizing as to why people didn’t agree with me. Why did I have the need to have to help or save when it was considered interfering?
Well many years later a great awareness moment hit me. I am always upset, angry, hurt and confused when others wouldn’t go along with my thoughts and ideas. I started to take a deep look into myself. Here are some deep insights to my findings:
- My “right” isn’t necessarily going to work for everyone else.
- Getting a job done correctly can be completed in many different ways, not just “my” way.
- I can still have my beliefs, values and morals and be proud of them all without imposing them on others.
- I need to state my points, reflections and ideas in manners that others respond to. Matching to their communication style will help me get my point across.
- The opinions of others allow me to refocus on my own thoughts and decide whether I am on the right track or not.
I have learned to listen more. By listening fully I can ask the better questions to understand their view. This doesn’t mean I have conformed or I am selling out however I have established another view point and this is valuable for future discussions.
Each time we dig our heels in we cut ourselves off from learning. Being open to new concept and ideas are crucial in establishing good relationships. Having the ability to direct our ideas openly and listen to suggestions, can further enhance the development of our concepts. Not to mention the great personal growth we have allowed of ourselves.
We know in our hearts when something is really right for us! However, we need to respect that our needs and opinions may not match everyone. As business owners we come across clients that are meant to work with us and we come across those we could not help or wished we had not taken on. It is imperative that we communicate our needs and wants. It is more important to know that we can work effectively together to give our clients what they need and want.
So the questions remains, does being right make us happy? I think that being happy makes it all right.
Have a happy day!
Anna Ottaviani is a Board Certified NLP Master Practitioner & Master Coach, Board Certified Master Hypnotherapist,Creating Your Future® , Time Line® Therapist Practitioner and Reiki Master. Her methods are unique and tailored to each individual client. She can be reached at www.sucessfullyyou.ca or by phone at 289-221-5772. You can follow her on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/successfullyyou?ref=ts&fref=ts